Since you are tired of mediocre relationships that are unfulfilling and leave you unhappy, I welcome you to try something different before you look for another partner.
Here are the 7 steps to follow to attract love in your life and manifest a partner.
Write it Down
My favorite part of life creation: writing it down. Set up a nice space: close the blinds, light a candle or incense, wear comfy clothes, grab your journal, and start writing down the partner you want to have.
What is their physique? What are their interests? How do they spend their free time? What is their temperament? How do they handle conflict? How do they treat others? How do they treat you? Be as specific as you can.
Bonus: Writing about how you feel in the relationship is also great for attracting love into your life.
I will share a whole post on scripting and its importance in how I was able to manifest a boyfriend and will link that here when it is live.
Work on Yourself
Would I date myself?
If the answer to this question is anything but “yes,” you have some work to do. How can you expect to date an amazing person if you are not an amazing person, yourself? Become “dateable” and work on whatever behavior you do that you wouldn’t want to see in your perfect partner.
Helpful Tip: Refer to how you responded to the conflict resolution and how they treat others/you questions. Do you behave this way?
Take Yourself Out
Go on dates and participate in activities you’d enjoy doing with a partner, by yourself. This will require some level of comfort in being alone. So, if you find yourself only doing activities outside of the home with friends, make it a point to spend some time alone and take yourself out on dates.
For me, I knew my perfect partner would spend their free time outdoors exploring new places. I started taking solo adventures to new places in Arizona, the first being a trip to Prescott for a sunrise hike around Watson Lake.
Be Open
Are you truly ready to attract love?
Are you truly ready for a romantic partner?
Have you healed enough from your previous relationships to be open to this ideal partnership?
This step ties into step 2 and working on yourself but with a focus on your heart.
How are your relationships with your family?
Your friends?
Your enemies?
Your exes?
If there is resentment or disdain for anyone in your heart, it may be difficult to be truly open to the ideal, loving partnership you desire.
Spend time reflecting and releasing the negative energy and emotions tied to strained relationships. They were doing the best they could at the time with the tools they had, as were you. Forgive them. Forgive yourself. Learn and grow.
Don’t Settle
As you spend time on dating apps and meeting potential suitors, remember your journaling exercise and the perfect partner you crafted.
While it is important to allow for some deviation and not get hung up on some of the details (ie, they like football but you wrote they would like basketball), there are items on your list that are non-negotiable to you. Be honest with yourself as you go on dates and get to know someone.
Tip: As you energetically shift into the person who has their dream partner, you may experience suitors who are close to that perfect person, but are lacking in distinct key ways. Be mindful of this and remember that those “noes” are getting you one step closer to the “yes.”
Trust Your Gut
Emotions can be messy and keep us in situations that are no longer serving us. I will cover this more in step 7, but it is important to mention it here.
When you find your ideal partner, there is an all-knowing that this is the relationship for you and where you are right now. I understand this to be the “gut” feeling, which is a bit different from the emotional “love” feeling.
While watching Mel Robbins on YouTube, I heard Dr. Spirit explain her concept of RISES and compatibility1. You and your partner should align:
- Recreationally
- Intellectually
- Spiritually
- Emotionally
- Sexually
In the video, Dr. Spirit discussed how not every letter of RISES needs to be present for a successful partnership. When I watched the video, I knew I did not want to settle on any of those items in my next relationship. I knew my current partner was right for me because we aligned in every area.
Do not allow for limerance or love or any other heavy emotion to blind you from what you know deep within your gut. The RISES list is a helpful metric to confirm to you what you already know: is this person actually right for me?
Let Go
Not all relationships and partnerships are meant to last forever. If you and your partner continue to grow and change together through life, then great. The expectation that this is the case for everyone in every situation, however, is unlikely.
It is possible that although this person was the perfect partner for you for some time, you may reach a point where this is no longer the case. Or they may reach a point where they feel that way. Understanding how the universe and life work, it is okay and necessary to let them go.
It is far worse to hold onto something you and your partner feel miserable in than it is to let go of the relationship, releasing them back into the universe. Only after that can you rendezvous with the next soul you are meant to engage with.
Find solace in knowing that although the body enjoys patterns and routine, the soul is at peace with the ebb and flow of life.
Releasing this person back to the universe means you are remaining true to yourself and living out your ideal life, no matter what.
Thank you for reading. I hope you found this post helpful and feel encouraged to attract that perfect partner of yours. Trust the universe and timing and remember that all things in life are borrowed. Go with the flow.
Much Love.
- “The Psychology Of Compatibility | The Mel Robbins Show.” YouTube, uploaded by Mel Robbins Show, 28 April 2020, www.youtube.com/watch?v=W1hA4cKXU18. ↩︎
