So you’ve started your new job and are wondering how to make the most of it since you spend most of your day at work. Or perhaps you’ve been working at a place for some time and want to navigate creating stronger relationships with your coworkers.
Don’t worry. I got you.
Having strong workplace relationships is key to creating a positive work environment. If you are anything like me, you want to have at a minimum cordial relationships with all your coworkers. If you are really like me, you’ll strive to be on friendly terms with all your coworkers.
In no particular order, here are my 11 tips for building better workplace relationships.
1. Be genuine
As cliche as it may sound, being genuine is key to building better workplace relationships and creating a positive workplace environment.
I am not suggesting you show your anger or frustration towards someone by acting rudely, but rather be comfortable with your feelings and act accordingly. I find it is easier to enjoy a workplace environment when I stay true to my feelings and values instead of creating a facade that I am forced to keep up with.
Pro Tip: You may not like a coworker’s personality but you can remain polite and cordial instead of trying to force a workplace friendship with them.
2. Talk to people about their interests
- Has your coworker mentioned a hobby of theirs? Ask them more about it.
- See a family photo on your coworker’s desk? Ask them about their family.
- Notice a collection of sports team memorabilia in their cubicle? Ask them how the latest game went.
This tip is a great way to create a connection with someone or, at a minimum, have them feel connected to you. People love to talk about themselves, especially once you get them going on a topic they feel passionate about. Look for signals to learn what your coworker is interested in.
Pro Tip: If you know your coworker has a kid, ask them about their kid. I have yet to meet someone who doesn’t love talking about their kid!
3. Determine how you (and others) prefer to connect
It is important to understand how both you and your coworkers feel most comfortable connecting with others. There are three ways to facilitate connecting with people:
- Large Group – You with 5 or more people
- Small Group – You with 2 to 4 other people
- One-on-One – You with another individual
Each person will have their preference so I find it helpful to understand that and seek opportunities that align with their preference when trying to build a connection with someone.
I love connecting one-on-one but notice a lot of my current coworkers prefer a small group. A small group is nice because all 5 of you can fit in one vehicle to drive to get lunch and all be involved in the same conversation when at the table. Once there are 6 or more people in a group setting, there tend to be several conversations happening at the lunch table or event and it feels more siloed than together.
4. Talk to your supervisor/boss
I find that my workplace experience feels better whenever I have a positive relationship with my supervisor.
Your supervisor can be your biggest advocate as well as filter the workplace jargon and noise as it trickles down from the big wigs at the top. It is advantageous to be on speaking terms with your boss, especially to use as a resource as you navigate various challenges in the workplace. Seek out opportunities to talk with your boss and connect on topics that interest them (see Tip #2).
5. Participate in work functions
Yes, even when you don’t want to.
Now, I am not saying you need to attend every single event your work offers, but at least make a point to attend some of the work functions.
These are good opportunities to build connections with others and show your face around to folks who you may not work with on a regular basis. A nice way to feel connected at work and create a positive work environment is to have work pals in different departments.
You never know when you have a computer question that Jim down in IT can help fix right away instead of submitting a ticket for help and waiting hours for a response.
6. Write notes after conversations
If you have a terrible memory and struggle to recall details someone discusses with you, take notes on what was discussed immediately after the conversation.
I met a lady at a conference who carried a small notebook with her that she wrote notes about each person she met that helped her recall the conversation later. This is a great system and could be used at any time, not just at conferences!
If you feel embarrassed about taking notes while someone is talking, wait until the conversation ends or you return to your desk to grab the notebook and jot down notes. Even if you do not use the notebook to read whatever you write, the act of physically writing it down can help you remember the interaction.1
Pro Tip: This can even be applied to building relationships outside of the office. I often take notes on the back of business cards after meeting someone at networking events.
7. Be impeccable with your word
This tip for building better workplace relationships and creating a positive work environment comes from The Four Agreements:
“Being impeccable with your word is not using the word against yourself.”2
Use kind words when speaking both about yourself and others. Refrain from gossip (see Tip #9) and remain positive with your thoughts and words.
8. Be receptive to talking breaks
In every place I worked, especially in the white-collar professional setting, there are breaks from work throughout the day that consist of random chats. Be receptive to these breaks and welcome them as opportunities to connect and build relationships with your coworkers.
In the open seating setting, like open-air cubicles, it is easy to overhear conversations between coworkers and want to join in with your own ideas. So long as it is not interfering with your assignments, participating in these conversations is a great way to build rapport with your coworkers, thus creating a more positive work environment.
Pro Tip: Be sure to interact, but not interject, when participating in these workplace chat breaks.
9. Avoid gossip and toxic coworkers
Word travels fast in the workplace. Do you really want to be known as someone who has something negative to say about everyone and everything?
Work can be frustrating, I get it. But complaining about it at the office may follow you around longer than your actual feelings toward the event in the first place! I find it is best to keep your gripes about your job and coworkers to yourself or your friends and family outside of the office.
Pro Tip: If you are interacting with coworkers who are beginning to gossip, find an excuse to walk away from the conversation.
10. A smile goes a long way
- How do you feel when you are around someone who is generally upbeat and always smiling?
- What about when you are around someone who is frowning all the time?
- Is there a difference in how you feel when you smile throughout the day?
If you want to build better workplace relationships, then start by being a more positive person in the office. Friendliness is attractive and will help you gain strong professional relationships in the long run.
Think about the type of person you would want to interact with or approach in the office. If that type of person is smiling, warm, and engaging, seek to become that type of person. A smile truly goes a long way in building better relationships and creating a positive work environment.
11. Be yourself
It is our uniqueness that makes us special.
- If you are really into an interesting hobby, talk about it next time you are speaking with a coworker.
- Do you have fun travel plans coming up? Talk about it with your cubicle mate.
- Is there a TV show you are into? Bring it up during small talk at the water cooler.
Show parts of your personality and what makes you unique to your coworkers. It helps build rapport and connection with others around the office, thus fostering a positive work environment.
Are you interested in learning about money? Curious if you are doing the right thing with your finances as a Young Professional? Check out this post to learn my tips for having better money habits at a Young Professional!
- H., Audrey L. “Handwriting but Not Typewriting Leads to Widespread Brain Connectivity: A High-density EEG Study with Implications for the Classroom.” Frontiers in Psychology, vol. 14, 2024, p. 1219945, https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2023.1219945. Accessed 20 Dec. 2024. ↩︎
- Ruiz, Don Miguel. The Four Agreements. Amber-Allen Publishing, 1997, pp. 32. ↩︎
